IWSG: Turning things upside down

This post is for Insecure Writer's Support Group, hosted on the first Wednesday of every month by the fabulous Alex Cavanaugh. Anyone can join. Sign up here!

Ok, ok, I don't have a good excuse for posting today instead of tomorrow, except that a few others have and I had this post ready YESTERDAY, so... here you go!

Sometimes when I'm painting I get frustrated -- I visualize where things are going versus where I want them to go and I can't make up the difference. I hate that. But then, if I turn the canvas upside down, I get a whole new point of view... and it's inspiring! That doesn't mean I'll leave it that way... but new perspective can help me get my vision back in focus, to realign my aim... and sometimes new and great things come out of it!

I want to figure out how to do that more with my writing... because things are not going at all where I thought they were going with my WIP and I feel pretty deflated about that. So I'm wondering what I can do to regain some inspiration. How can I turn my WIP on its head? Maybe my MCs motivations are more nefarious than I give her credit for. Or maybe my main villain is really my MC...

The cygnets are here and they are
the most beautiful ugly
ducklings I have ever seen.

What do you do to turn things upside down?

Insecure Writer's Support Group, yay!

Hi all! It's time for a monthly installment of Insecure Writer's Support Group, as hosted by Alex Cavanaugh.

I don't know about you, but I can't believe it's already April! Where does the time get to?

I wanted to post about blogging memes today... because they make me insecure. Currently, when I look through my blog reader, it seems like I am the only person I know who is NOT doing the A-Z Challenge, a monthly meme started here.

Now, part of the reason I didn't join in was because I've been doing an internship in the City (which ends April 19th). The internship has been intense and educational and I'm SO glad I have had the chance to take part, to get dressed up professionally, commute into NYC, and learn about the art of discovering a marketable manuscript. But it takes up a lot of time! So I haven't been posting very regularly, anyhow... and the idea of writing a blog post a day within the loose theme of the alphabet (much less the more planned out themes that I see some of you are doing)... well I'm not super woman.

But also, I don't want to be a joiner just because I think I'm supposed to attach meaning to something that everyone else does. I'm not just referring to this particular challenge. There are "blog awards" and weekly/monthly memes all OVER the place! How does a girl choose between them all without feeling like she's missing out on something, or more importantly, without feeling like she's losing her blogging identity?

Obviously I am choosing. I'm participating in a meme right now! IWSG has been very useful to me - from reading other writers' insecurities to sharing my own insecurities to receiving supportive feedback. I will definitely continue to participate in this one. I just wonder, does anyone else out there besides me feels overwhelmed by the flood of daily/weekly/monthly blog memes?

Making Time: Insecure Writers' Support Group

It's the first Wednesday in March! Can you believe it? That means it's time for Insecure Writer's Support Group, hosted by the fabulous Alex Cavanaugh, who, by the way, just published another novel, CassaFire! Yay Alex! Living the dream! And thanks for hosting us insecure writers. We need it.

I wanted to mention "Making Time" today. I haven't had to deal with this issue in a while. See, for the past year and a half I have been living the dream... not working, just writing. Except that I didn't really take advantage of the time while I had it. I was distracted by other things and allowed much of the time I could have devoted to writing to slip away.

Now that I am doing an internship in the City three days a week (on week two and it's going GREAT!) I am suddenly reminded of the value of time. I have less time for posting and less time for writing because other things are taking up the space (you know, like groceries, cooking meals, walking the dog, etc.).

It's only two weeks in, but I'm already worrying about how my creative outlets will suffer from neglect. Am I over reacting? This past weekend I did put down 900 words towards my WIP (in the new POV, too!). And that's huge! Because I have been stalling and recently got a bump of inspiration. But I wonder if that is an exception to the rule and if the urge to create won't be drowned out by the lazy monster or the "I have so many other necessary things to do" monster. I know I have to build better habits, but I'm a little at a loss as to how to do it without creating a crusty layer of guilt that I have to break through every time I want to write.

Ugh. Does anyone else ever feel this way? Damned if you do and damned if you don't... It's honestly one of my biggest barriers to moving forward with my writing, I think.

New post with some rambling about my internship on Friday. Thanks for listening.

Insecure Writers Support Group

I know, I know... 3 posts in 3 days from me... it's almost too much to handle! It's the first Wednesday in the month and I'm joining in on Alex Cavanaugh's Insecure Writer's Support Group. If you're a writer and you have insecurities you would like to share, you should join us... and if you're a writer and you haven't got any insecurities, would you PLEASE share how you came to be so self-confident?

I guess my insecurity for this week has to do with copy, or frequent lack thereof. I find myself more often than not staring at a blank screen and not able to think of anything to say. Or worse, I don't even turn on the computer because I feel like nothing I could think of (if I COULD think of anything) would be interesting or worth putting down in print. And then I hear that oft repeated adage "A writer writes..." and I think to myself, well... I'm not writing, so I must not be a writer. And downward I spiral into a pit of deep despair.

So I guess that leads me to the problem of well meaning but ill timed/placed ... encouragement... for lack of a better word. As an insecure writer who has struggled with identity and where I fit in all this wide and varied world of blog posts, novels, novellas, poetry, short stories, news articles, etc., etc., etc., I can tell you that even "A writer writes..." can kill a budding creative spirit. Well... maybe not kill it, but definitely set it back.

The thing I keep coming back to is that she's different for everyone, the muse. For some lucky souls she is a slave driver, an unforgiving mistress that forces you to stay up late pouring words from your fingertips to the page. That's not who she is for me... for me, she's coy and fleeting, stifled by a wide variety of worries that need to be quelled and frightened of monster doubts that need to be re-captured and caged.

One way that I am finding help in these past few weeks is through this awesome network of writers on the web. Between IWSG, YA and Teen Tuesday, and Knights of Microfiction, there are some really great ways for me to stretch out my figurative vocal chords, get the words flowing, and encourage the muse to come out and play. And I keep working on my doubts and monsters... and keep my WIP open in the background to remind me that there is more to be done.

Insecure Writer's Support Group

I've been lurking around others' sites long enough looking at this monthly blog group. It's time to self-identify. I am an insecure writer. There's no two ways around that. So, the idea of this support group is to post once a month with this tag and talk about my insecurities (and hopefully about victories over my insecurities)... and then go around to other writers' blogs and comment/show support for them. I can get behind that. Especially because one of my main insecurities is that no one is actually listening to (reading) me. Oh, but thank you SO much to my good friends who consistently comment, even if it's just to say hello.

Isn't that just every writer's fear, somewhere deep inside? That no matter how targeted, how sculpted, how well written your work, no one will connect with it. You'll meet with the sound of crickets... if you're lucky... instead of the sound of interaction. Because... even negative interaction is something... even if people disagree with you, at least you know that they heard you...

Sigh... so that's my insecure writer's post, my first one. Now I'm off to say hi to some other writers out there, to comment, to play, to interact.